2006-2007: The End

It's so important to me to reflect often. And what's amazing is that every time I do, my thoughts travel to something new. It's refreshing, and it calms me down. Therefore, I was especially relieved to have the oppurtunity to do so in class the other day. I was having a busy, non-stop day, and by the time class came around I was losing stamina. So, again, thank you, Grace, for such a day-saving assignment!

The year has been drastically different than my freshman. Listening to everyone else's thoughts in class reminded me very much of my experiences before, and for those who were worried about forming strong friendships or making future decisions, in my mind I wanted to tell them that it was all going to be okay. With respect to Patrick's comment about family, I, too, have grown much closer to my parents and my younger brother, as well as my close friends from home. I don't know what it is about this year, but when I think about it, I have really grown into myself this. What makes me most content is the I really feel independent, and assured with regards to my morals, my abilities, my goals, and my actions. I used to come up with a lot of excuses, reasons why I didn't achieve what I wanted to, or why I wasn't where I wanted to be. I suppose I learned to confront what I wanted, and to be proactive about it. This also brings me to reflect upon the importance of initiating my own thoughts, and forming my own opinions. I realized that I don't gain anything from just reading material and memorizing it. That doesn't work my brain at all. So, slowly, I began to question what I was reading. How did I feel? Did I agree? What did I want to know more about? In a way, I felt like I was learning how to learn. And when you apply yourself to what you're learning, it is a much more enriching experience. And this doesn't just apply to academic information. It has to do with your surroundings, and being aware of what is going on. If I'm tired and my head hurts all the time, medicine is a painkiller, not a cure. Why was I tired? Was I eating enough? Was I eating right? Preventative action.

As this year has progressed, I have definitely learned to form my own ideas and opinions, and to stick by them. What else is truly ours other than our thoughts and ideas?

Lit. Analysis Paragraph

Both stories highlight the coming of age of the protagonists. Forced to enter American society as Asian Americans, being the first generation of their family in America, both ultimately battle the stereotypes that are concomitant with living in a white society. By analyzing both journeys of the protagonists from American Born Chinese and American Son, several similarities between the two arise, despite their drastically disparate endings. Though it seems that the two could be friends, having dealt with Asian stereotypes, experiencing the need to fit into society, and ultimately deciding their futures via a turning point, the resulting fate that both characters choose are on opposite ends of the spectrum.

Lit. Analysis Topic

1) Comparing and contrasting the coming of age as well as the portrayal of in the protagonists of American Son and American Born Chinese.
2) comparing and contrasting supporting characters of Tomas and Wei-Chen
3) Comparing and Contrasting the articles surrounding American Born Chinese and Woman Warrior
4) Comparing and contrasting "white privilege" with american son
5) comparing and contrasting "white privilege" with ABC

American Son - A Coming of Age Story

Tomas's crude response to Gabe's innocent question, in which he beat Gabe into the asphalt, spurs Gabe's coming of age. It seems an effort to escape Tomas's condascending eye and his mother's suffocating meekness, but in addition marks the beginning of Gabe's identity development. I think Roley devotes a large portion of the story to Gabe's journey with Stone because during that time he learns about his cultural and social identity, as well as social stratifications in California.

Portrayed as a Mexican gangster, Gabe is strongly aware of how Tomas is perceived when they are in the Producer's mansion selling Johan. Pretending to be tough when he is not, putting up a rude front in an effort to be taken seriously, and pretty much flipping out on Gabe when Gabe asks if he is crying, Tomas utilizes the unfortunate events of his past as an excuse to act on his rage and anguish. Realizing that he is following in Tomas's footsteps, whether intentionally or not, Gabe acknowledges that he indeed does not want to be like Tomas when he is older. This is the first significant turning point in his coming of age. Instead of knowing who he wants to be, he only knows who he does not want to be like.

During his journey with Stone, he confronts a plethora of situations that force him to evaluate his cultural identity. Though he looks Mexican and Asian at the same time, at certain points he hopes to look Mexican, in an effort to fit in. At other points, he hopes to look more Asian, in an effort not be regarded as a Mexican, for several negative implications Stone mentions. And at other times he hopes to just look completely White, as to not draw attention to himself in a diner filled with White people. At one point, he hopes his Oldsmobile does not convey it's gangster past, and at another point he uses his gangster experience to belittle the two small town Mexicans he encounters.

Stone repeatedly mentions the crappy conditions of L.A., claiming that in his area no crime exists. Gabe first becomes aware of the disparity in living conditions between his home and this place, where his mother has to sleep in the back of the house to avoid drive by shootings. It seems that by mentioning these differences, Gabe is meant to hear about them because he is meant to live a healthier life than Tomas's. His exposure to to these differences and the realizations they arise surrounding his own life fuel his personal development and growth into the person he wants to be.

American Born Chinese - First 20 pages

Gene Luen Yang pokes fun at Chinese culture in his first image, where the Gods and Goddesses are wining and dining. However, though lighthearted throughout, an serious tone underlines the first 20 pages of his story as well, reminding the audience about his central theme. Established once the Monkey King is confronted by the guard at the dinner party, he first realizes discrimination when the guard points out that he cannot enter because he is a monkey. The first reason the guard poses, which is that the Monkey King is wearing no shoes and thus cannot enter, is not the main reason he will not let the Monkey King in. The same can be seen in society today, were racism has become invisible because it is systematically embedded in American culture. Many excuses can be made to hide the real factor: racism. A fundamental turning point in the first 20 pages is when the Monkey King recognizees the smell of his species, and wonders how he can detach himself from it. The message Yang conveys is that as an outcast, many times instead of embracing the differences he or she will first turn to anger (as the Monkey King attacked everyone at the dinner party), and then to something far more dangerous: ways to change him or herself to fit in.

The Oracles - Crab metaphor (my thoughts in 10 minutes)

The imagery created by the metaphor is extremely effective in conveying Poblete's tone. The imagery of likening Grandma Fausta and Grandma Patricia specifically to crabs creates a chaotic, every man or woman for him or herself scene in my mind. Not only that, but a competitive one as well. Poblete could have stopped with "letting go of those behind us before we crawl out", but instead continues to highlight the cruelty of the situation by saying "letting go of those behind us and pushing them back before we crawl out". It seems Poblete is claiming that finding refuge in America is so highly coveted in the Phillipines that one will sacrifice his or her family to reach here. Also, the imagery is ironic in the fact that the Grandmothers view coming to America such an achievement, yet Poblete describes that they have to "crawl out of the barrel" to reach here, a description that carries a negative, shameful connotation. With the complacency Poblete describes this metaphor with, it seems she is detached from the situation because she does not understand why America is so highly sought, to the point where she finds Grandma Patricia's resentment unwarranted and almost stupid.

The best surprise came when I met my family. How was I to know that they would be so different than my brothers and I? That they used different washing machines and they walked to work everyday and they each had full time maids? Communication with my grandparents proved most difficult. It was a complete culture shock, for them and for us as well. They had no inclination of the white suburbia that my brothers and I had been exposed to our entire lives. They knew nothing other than a bustling city life and unbearable humidity. They had different expectations of us than they did for our cousins. At that point, I felt like I had been dipped back in time to their generation. Where had I been? Where was I going? To them, I was an ABC, and that was enough for them to treat me differently than my cousins in Hong Kong.

My Turn Essay Topics

1) Why/How my grandparents want me to marry no one other than a Chinese person
2) My family in Basking Ridge
3) Affirmative Action - What is it really
4) Slang/Hate crimes
5) You are who you hang out with
6) Acceptance/Rejection of ABCs
7) Are you Korean?
8) Bi-racial cousins
9) Mom in the workplace
10) history of racism

Extra Credit Assignment

Ryan Takemiya’s presentation was not only engaging but informative as well. Rather than speaking just on Asian hip hop culture, which is what I was under the impression he was going to cover, he delved into the complex issue of how cultural and environmental differences have lead to differences in Asian hip hop versus American hip hop. A presentation filled with passion, wit, and an impeccable ability to relate to a college-aged audience, Ryan Takemiya’s talk was one of the most enjoyable I’ve been to all year.

Ryan’s talk opened with some music history. He made an interesting point: American hip hop focuses much more on the downbeat, while Asian hip hop focuses on the upbeat. He proceeded to play examples of each. What immediately came to my mind was why I hadn’t noticed this before. Is that why Asian hip hop sounds so different? It seems like such an obvious difference, but at the same time something that could easily go undetected.

The cultural differences he alluded to included the perception of appropriate rap content. I can see where he's coming from when he said that Asian hip hop artists face different repercussions than American hip hop artists. For example, rapping about women would be considered highly taboo in Asia, while here in America it is considered a social norm. Also, if someone in Asia were to go to jail, if ever released they would be immediately outcasted by their family, community, and face great difficulty in getting a job. According to Takemiya, jail is an end all be all, whereas here in America, it seems that glorifying jail time can boost our reputation. At least in the rap world, it seems that rappers can rap about jail, women, and crime without fear of being socially outcasted.

Despite these differences, Takemiya ended his talk encouraging each of us to contribute to revolutionizing Asian Americans in the media. Convinced that Asian American artists are just recently breaking into mainstream media, he again encouraged us to take advantage of the circumstances; opportunities exist for Asian Americans now like they never have before.

Kingston VS. Chin

"In one tale, Chin parodies "Woman Warrior" by writing of a woman author who changes the Joan of Arc myth by turning her into a man who is castrated and burned at the stake" (LA Times article).

The debate between Chin and Kingston seems like it's more destructive to Asian American literature than it is beneficial. I cannot truly understand in any way how it is constructive. I think it is helpful to criticize peer literature for the purpose of bringing new issues to light or progressing as authors, and if part of a debate it is important to do so with integrity. However, from this article, it seems that a sense of integrity is lost, and literature is created for the sole purpose of hurting another author.

Reference to feet binding in China: In what other ways are women "bounded" by society today?

This question was initially a difficult one to answer. It was surfacing on something more specific, perhaps linking foot binding to a similar instance of modern day oppression of women. However, the more I read the question, the broader the question seemed, and thus I retreated to answer the question as if I were answering the same question about female oppression that has been resurfacing recently. My frustration does not lie in the question itself, but in the feeling that there is another level of understanding we have lingered above penetrating.

Frustration aside, I responded to two facets of the prompt. My first reaction was to examine the stereotypes that women today face, and the means available by which this idea of beauty is attainable. Stereotypical beauty can be broken down on three levels: behavior, dress, and physicality. Behavior refers to the mannerisms and intentional portrayal of oneself for the purpose of being attractive and desired. Dress refers to what is socially accepted as attractive attire i.e. tight shirts, tight jeans. Physicality refers to what is a stereotypically attractive body: being thin, tall, curvaceous, sultry, etc. In the societal standards of what is considered attractive in America, women are compared to these standards, and thus in a sense are "bound" by them.

The other approach I took to this prompt was that of gender roles and discrimination today. Gender discrimination is evident in the workplace, where women of similar education attainment of men still earn less in comparison, and are less likely to receive authoritative positions over men. Also, stereotyping remains from the typical roles that women have served in the past. The housewife or subservient nature of women from the past effects women today in that expectations of them are not as high as they are for men. In this way, women are "bound" by the stereotypes that define their gender roles.

There is no denying that women are somewhat "bound" today as a result of their gender. The question remains: what has made the circumstances better today than they were during the days of foot binding?

One Step Ahead

I could never understand why. Asking wasn't an option: he was oblivious himself to the fact. Maybe it's in the genes, or maybe he has special powers.

It's harder when you're the older sibling, not to mention the oldest. I wanted to be the one establishing standards and leaving precedents imbedded in our family history. But my little brother, well, he always paced one step ahead.

Do I sound envious? Because that really isn't my intention. For years my overwhelming pride in his academic stellar-ness was surpressed by the immature competition of childhood. If I spent hours studying for an exam while he spent one and the rest reclining to music, well one thing was always in my favor - I could still beat him up. But, as I said, that really wasn't my intention.

Years of years and years past, the suppression subsided, and my biggest fear seeped in: I didn't ignore his gift of intellectualism to reprimand him, I had been too afraid to acknowledge it myself. But once I did, I couldn't help it. I think that's one thing younger siblings will never realize: older brothers, sisters, love them more than they imagine, or ever care to show.

We Are All Suspects Now - My Memoir

In the stories told, what comes up a lot is the issue of documentation and being able to prove the identity you assume. This has inevitably led me to think about what my grandmother could have gone through had she been under different circumstances.

My grandma lived in the GuangZhou region of China up until the era of Mao. When he took over and implemented his policies, my grandmother and her family lost literally everything except for each other. She moved next to Burma, but without any sort of legal documentation or paper work to prove who she was. Any sort of documentation had been lost or left behind in China. I remember the first time I realized how serious an issue this could pose. When in middle school, out of curiousity I casually asked my mom one day, "how old is grandma?" And my mom replied, "Umm...I think she's somewhere between 63 and 67 years old". At first I thought nothing of it. I said next, "Well, what year was she born in?" And my mom, rather accepting of the fact, said "She isn't sure. She doesn't remember exactly and her papers were lost a long time ago."

Thinking back on these circumstances, had the Chinese been profiled as terrorists, like people from the Middle East, South Asia, etc. are today, my grandmother probably would have been deported as well, especially if strict immigration laws were put into effect. If something like the "round up" that affected Pakistanis was implemented, where illegal immigrants were forced to turn themselves in, for the Chinese, my life along with my extended family's would have been very different.

I believe this really sums up the title of Nguyen's book. Manipulate and twist, substitute and swtich, and any one of us could be considered terrorists. It's all a matter of perception and portrayal, fueled by nothing deadlier than fear. All it would take for my grandma to face the consequences of not having proper documentation like thousands in America are today, is for the media to profile the Chinese as dangerous and threatening to the country. This in of itself is something that all Americans should be concerned with.

Response to Carol

As a member of PAC [Pan Asian Council], we actively engage in discussing community issues, especially ones such as the carol published in "The Primary Source". We spent almost the entirety of a one-hour meeting debating whether freedom of speech has been violated. Freedom of speech means just that: you're allowed to say whatever you want without fear of punishment. When does this line get crossed? Is the environment different on college campuses?

The conclusion we reached was: yes. I'm not sure exactly what the laws and rules are [someone mentioned them briefly], but they are something to the effect that any racially discriminating remarks are subject to penalty. This reminds me very much of the first day of class, when we were discussing whether Adidas should be penalized for marketing the "Yellow Series". Should we be allowed, in this capitalistic society, to deny them the right to sell that line? It's a frustrating debate, one that seemingly never reaches a comforting conclusion.

With respect to the carol, I do believe that it should not have been published, for the sole reason that it is offensive, rude, and non-conducive to creating a comfortable university environment. I also believe, however, that they had the right to publish it. So, in the end, I guess I have to agree with what Mitch Robinson said in the campus media: "Freedom of speech should be used with respect" http://insidehighered.com/news/2006/12/12/tufts. Our university is based on the principle of respect, for each other, for a comfortoable environment, for the ability to learn and give back. I guess we all trusted that no one would have posted such a poem in the first place.

We Are All Suspects Now - Through Chapter 2

Nguyen's We Are All Suspects Now provides within just the first two chapters a variety of anecdotes, in-depth and not, about immigrants in America who have most definitely faced increased discrimination due to the events of September 11th. Reading about the consequences of this discrimination is both frustrating and disturbing. Learning about how government institutions and policy, implicitly or explicity, helped feed this discrimination, is down right disheartening. For example, many references are made to Attorney General Ashcroft's approval of granting officials unfair authority to invade basic privacy rights.

Although I do believe each anecdote is important to the book in it's own way, providing a variety of perspectives allowing us to broaden our scope of the issue at hand, at times the proximity, length, and order of the stories can be overwhelming and a bit confusing. On the other hand, this could be seen to prove yet another point about post 9/11 America: this issue is real, current, and flooding our country - the time to deal with it has long been due.

I think the extent to which American ideals has been reversed it alluded to in the Introduction of the book, where it says, "people without status and with a certain profile must earn and deserve their place in society, must prove why they should not be suspected, jailed, and shipped away" (XV). How can we grant some the privelage of "innocent until proven guilty", while others the exact opposite, and still justify that America is a country based on equality? This quote particularly struck me because it made me stop and question whether America really has become so undoubtedly segregated.

My question for Ms. Nguyen is this: Are most immigrants in America aware of how recent policies that have been put into effect essentially discriminate against them? Why or why not? If they are, are they willing to mobilize against them?